Book Review: A Lady’s Submission

review-cover-a lady's submissionTitle: A Lady’s Submission [The Warriors of Ar’mora 1]

Author: Frank Carlyle

Genre: Erotica, Historical, Fantasy

Rating: 1 Star (DNF)

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From what I can tell, this is no longer available on Amazon, I am unsure if it is available elsewhere.

Description/Synopsis:

Last of a clan that once ruled over a vast trade network and determined the fate of empires, Mahlon Arn, has the task of reclaiming a place once lost and now hidden within the jungled corridors of a tributary river that feeds into the mighty Amazon River. It’s a past that almost no one remembers except for the few who dare to return and once more reclaim all that once was and begin to build what is to become.

Journey deep into the jungle and follow the story of a warrior who reclaims a kingdom, only to ache for the completion of a prophecy spoken over him by a dying father. A prophecy that comes in the form of a red haired fantasy lady, who is born up the river by chance and circumstance or perhaps by Divine will, and that must be claimed and utterly brought into submission by the man, who has been tasked to not only reclaim a past but to build a future based on righteousness.

WARNING – SPOILERS MAY ENSUE BEYOND THIS POINT – REVIEW BELOW

You know that phrase “I can’t even.”, that’s how I feel about this book. I didn’t get past the first sentence before I realized this was going to be a very difficult read.

The wind whipped viciously back and forth across the land ever strengthened by the rising tempest of the ocean and beat against the rocks of the foundation of the last of the Sea People’s fortresses.

This pretty much summed up the entirety of what I read from that point forward (and I didn’t make it far). The writing was excruciatingly verbose and complicated in structure to the point of being clunky and muddled. Run on sentences, a formal tone with a lack of punctuation, and strange word choices made me cringe. The story didn’t flow, and the dialogue was easily just as formal and unnatural sounding as the narrative.

I thought him beyond speech as he lay staring up into my eyes with all the love of a father that I had yearned to watch grow old and enjoy playing with the offspring of my loins.

I pushed, really pushed to get past the first chapter of this story several times, and finally, I decided the book wasn’t for me. The writing –maybe- would have held up in a high fantasy, but as a historical erotica, it was just… poorly written, and needlessly complicated… and I don’t think it should be a chore to read a book. I couldn’t get past the language to enjoy the characters or the plot, and it was frustrating and tedious. Eventually, I gave up and declared this a DNF.

There may be someone out there that enjoys this kind of writing… but for an erotica novel, where the sex is basically the entire reason for reading the book… the language of the narrative and characters just wasn’t appropriate, and I wouldn’t recommend it.

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